We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Well​-​Founded Fear

by Van 'Go

/
  • Streaming + Download

    A download in any format includes a hand-written 'thank you' letter from myself. 'Go Time!
    Purchasable with gift card

     

1.
(Verse 1) This is my first impression, y’all/ I pour my Soul out in this Session, y’all/ I guess I’m blessin’ y’all/ Try not to get lost in my thoughts/ But see my mind is filled with problems like math lessons, y’all/ It’s hard to stand tall when I’m who they expect to Fall/ Wintertime cold/ But I’m a winner times fo’/ Me and my niggas tryin’ to blow/ But see my city dyin’ slow, so/ We play the game/ They tootin’ the damned whistles/ And them niggas takin’ shots but they shootin’ wit’ jammed pistols/ When it comes to makin’ decisions, fuck it right’ll do/ I won’t attend every argument I’m invited to/ My Mama always tells me, “nobody’s as bright as you”/ And in my head I’m like, “Mama, you’re fuckin’ right”/ It’s true/ ‘Cause ever since birth I had to work for the rankin’/ Them church niggas bankin’/ So I’d Kirk for them Franklins/ I been knew how it felt to see my competition under me/ Livin’ wit’ myself, bitch/ And I’m in good company. (Verse 2) Take a look in my eyes/ And see the pain I often try to hide/ I bet you get exhausted tryna walk a mile in mine/ ‘Cause see my thoughts troubled/ Sittin’ thinkin’ about my Pops’ struggle/ ‘Cause of the pigment, when I’m sentenced/ Man, I’m tossed double/ Or how to keep from goin’ under when these broads love you/ Or how to make ‘em feel my Thunder, man I’m not Russell/ Man I can’t seem to find the words, boy this is not Ruzzle/ I will not walk subtle/ I cannot tread soft/ Wit’ every verse I spit, I’m tryna take they heads off/ Wit’ every line I write, I’m tryna make history/ Wit’ every bar I drop, I hope that they remember me/ I take what they ain’t give to me/ Middle finger to my enemy/ My life’s director yelled “action!”, motherfucker/ You know I’m the same/ Though I grow I never change/ Not for money, pussy, or ‘cause of the actions of another/ No matter my environment/ Never lose my enlightenment/ I’m me.
2.
(Verse 1) Every night I say a prayer/ Before I close my eyes/ If I get to see another day, I pray I touch the sky/ My eyes on the prize/ Even though a nigga tired/ Need a meal (mil’), super-sized/ Talkin’ cheese, not the fries/ Thank God/ Then I wake up, look at the ceiling/ Will my lyrics be Braille, would anybody feel ‘em?/ See, that’s the feelin’ that you get/ When yo’ city on the map/ Even baldheaded bitches get the Remy tryna wrap (rap)/ But that was last year/ Here to change shit, like a cashier/ I’m/ Here to check these pussies like a PAP smear/ I had fear/ It’s a wrap for that/ Never turnin’ back to actin’ worthless/ Know my purpose/ And it’s mad clear/ I won’t give up or stop my grind for that/ Sweet Brown, ain’t nobody got time for that/ Rise and shine for that/ ‘Cause I’m alarmin’ ya/ I show you how to turn a case of narcolepsy to insomnia. (Verse 2) I’m from a city where many niggas is heartless/ And shit ain’t gettin’ better/ They keep techs like Artest/ Way before he was Metta/ Make you lose hope/ They out here shootin’ like Kukoc/ School got my pockets too broke/ A nigga singin’ Blue Notes/ Man, ‘cause of your father’s fault/ Don’t be the reason your mama suffers another loss/ A couple chicks now he a boss/ So, he gotta floss/ Don’t know the price of rockin’ jewels is the holla cost/ At night I toss/ I need a moment, just to ask/ It’s such a task/ He rose from the dead, but I can’t get up for class?/ In the mornin’/ Grab my pen and pad, and I’m zonin’/ Finna blaze/ ‘Til the day/ That they put me in the grave/ Or the stage/ Boy, I’m just a renegade on a mission/ My people had Master’s (masters) before they paid tuition/ I wake up, pray up/ ‘Cause I’m standin’ shook/ From Hurricane Sandy to Sandy Hook.
3.
(Verse 1 – Dom Sirius) Took me a while to feel like…/ This, for it to kick in and feel like it’s real life/ Almost lost faith, fate got me to my feet/ How can you grab what’s out ya reach, if you never take that leap/ Ya first step can be ya savin’ grace or apocalyptic/ It’s funny how bein’ courageous has consequences/ ‘Cause when you try ya luck with the dice/ Win or lose, you stuck with that price/ And if you die, fuck it, that’s life/ But daddy need some new shoes, this one’s for you mama/ It’s true I’ma be worth every cent of those two commas/ I gots to be the truth, all’s possible in lieu/ Of these obstacles that end dreams, cock-a-doodle-do/ But I roll with the punches, learned to never give a fuck/ Life is full of ups and downs, remember to get ya nut/ And it’s over/ I’m bringin’ home the dub, too/ The one that made the fat lady sing/ BIG GUHS NEED LOVE TOOOOO!!! (Chorus) I’m on top of the world/ And I ain’t comin’ down/ I’m, swimmin’ in the sky so you’ll never see me drown/ I, disregard the nonsense when they try and hate/ And I’m sluggin’ all the curveballs they throwin’ my way/ So, if you waitin’ on the day that I no longer do it double XL/ Don’t hold your breath because you’ll never exhale/ You know why/ ‘Cause/ One day, we’ll be on top of the world/ On top of the world. (Verse 2 – Crushon) They never stoppin’ this confidence, I’m on top of it/ We opposite, ‘cause while my brain boils/ They sittin’ on empty toilets, not on shit/ Takin’ L’s like non-mobile Chicagoans/ But the problem is, thinkin’ the way they label dirt is cool/ But in a sense I’m convinced that they born on April 1st, she got you fooled/ But me, I can’t picture the shit/ I know a nigga ain’t trippin’ because I never had permission to slip/ They say I’m, losin’ they winnin’/ Confusin’ what these dudes do for women/ Just to get the same conclusional endin’/ So, I overlook they views and opinions/ Who you gon’ make believe?/ I ain’t used to pretendin’, boy I choose to be different/ And I’m tryna live it right/ So, ‘fore you try to give advice/ Just know my life is like a beautiful image, because/ I’m on top of the world/ I’m on top of the world. (Chorus) (Verse 3) And if you niggas sleepin’, I be that alarm clock/ Assassin mentality, all I’m sendin’ out is dome shots/ He back on his biz/ And when he spit, his flow is sick like African kids/ Verses put them men on pause (menopause) like she lackin’ her periods/ But through these words you may get to know me, then OD/ I’m like that spare up under the welcome mat, that’s low key/ These dudes bummy, that’s a shame/ ‘Cause even in my slumber you can hear my stomach rumble/ Boy, I’m hungry as a slave/ That’s my resume/ And way before I added spittin’ rhymes/ I had walked in on my Daddy sniffin’ lines/ The shit is gettin’ badder wit’ the times, I’m shook up/ A nigga steadily throwin’ jabs, I’m tryna get my hook up (hook-up)/ And every time I look up/ Damn, it’s brothers killin’ brothers on the news/ Too many black mothers wit’ the blues/ But don’t cry/ One day we’ll be on top of the world, Mama/ On top of the world. (Chorus)
4.
(Verse 1) Allergic to bullshit/ But you never see me breakin’ out or swellin’ up/ I walk and talk the shit that I’m sellin’ up/ Moms pissed off ‘cause she had to call my phone six times/ I’m busy but she ain’t tryna hear shit that I’m tellin’ her/ I hang up/ Just got a text/ From this girl, I fucked her friend and she tryna go next/ Ever since I hit college, less sleep, mo’ sex/ But you know a nigga grindin’, flow heavy Kotex/ I’m so stressed/ But I never let a nigga put my flame out/ I got problems up to here but/ I pretend I’m straight like homosexual niggas that ain’t came out/ Just tryna figure what this game ‘bout/ But I’m tired of playin’ it/ Fatigue settin’ in so it’s hard/ To be a big deal like passin’ out jumbo poker cards/ Second on my list is money/ First is gettin’ close to God/ And women come right after gear/ I ain’t stressin’ over broads/ And every time I spit, you hear my city in my dialect/ Baby, don’t knock it if you ain’t try it yet/ It’s 3 AM/ And she been goin’ down since twelve/ And I been up since five, and a nigga ain’t even tired yet.
5.
(Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.) “When we look at modern man, we have to face the fact that modern man suffers from a kind of poverty of the spirit. Which stands in glaring contrast to his scientific and technological abundance. We've learned to fly the air like birds, we've learned to swim the seas like fish. And yet we haven't learned to walk the Earth as Brothers and Sisters.”
6.
(Verse 1) Listenin’ to the mirror it tells me I look just like you, nigga/ But I always told myself that I’d be nothin’ like you, nigga/ My reflection’s the essence, so pain lies/ I’d commit suicide just to know the pain dies/ Swear we got the same eyes, from the color to the shape/ But because all yours saw was drugs, all that my two saw was hate/ Yours was seein’ what you made/ Mine were lookin’ at my dad/ While I had visions of the future, you had visions of the past/ Man, this shit so hard to grasp/ Hard to hide so it’s exposed/ You can tell that I’m your child, man I even got your nose/ I smelled your bullshit and you did crack/ And now I’m sniffin’ too, just tryna hold them tears back/ And not to mention same lips, same hands, God/ Affliction, witnessin’ your addiction landslide/ I vow to be the man I know that you could never be/ Our name’s the same so I’m runnin’ from the legacy/ (Chorus) And I don’t need no hook for this/ And I don’t need no book for this/ I just wanna tell you what I’m feelin’/ From the pain that I’m revealin’, know your son is still healin’/ Your son is still healin’/ Your son is still healin’/ I just wanna tell you what I’m feelin’/ From the pain that I’m revealin’, know your son is still healin’/ (Verse 2) You were breakin’ promises and I broke rules, but/ That didn’t last long/ Because from makin’ those mistakes/ I was only gonna end up right in your shoes/ And so I played it cool/ And hit the books to cope through/ But ‘cause you never told me life’s a lesson/ Got lost and stumbled as I tried to find the right direction/ And had you told me ‘bout the birds and bees and right protection/ I would’ve never slipped up and got my girlfriend pregnant/ Question, how could you not be there for me/ And when I needed help, why weren’t you my therapy/ Man, I swear to be/ A better father when I have mine/ Yeah, I’ll be there for every second, I’ll be on time/ And I would never put my hands on their mother/ My baby girl will know without a doubt her daddy loves her/ Please help me get a grip because I’m losin’ it/ And my son won’t witness drugs ‘cause he walked in on his daddy usin’ it (Chorus) (Verse 3) You gave nothin’, showed everything/ And still I love you for that/ I learned to persevere because I watched you struggle, in fact/ I’m contending adversity to get these words out/ But I got that body builder life, so it’s gon’ work out/ As I make sense of what you’re goin’ through/ I’m glad to see the poison no longer controllin’ you/ It’s been about two years now and you inspire me/ You kicked them rocks, congratulations, your sobriety/ But them life-sized nightmares, kept you from dreamin’/ Of a life that was cleaner than the one that you were leadin’/ Now you’re dealin’ wit’ it/ But I won’t add to the conflict/ ‘Cause it ain’t easy wit’ diabetes as a sidekick/ Life is schoolin’ you so I wait for your graduation/ You’re better than your circumstances and your situation/ It’s taken patience/ Just know our name’s the same/ And I look just like you, my nigga/ Let the legacy reign/ (Chorus) I don’t need no hook for this/ I don’t need no book for this/ I just wanna tell you what I’m feelin’/ From the pain that I’m revealin’, I can feel the wounds healin’/ Just know your son is through healin’.
7.
(Verse 1) Back on the road again/ I’m hardly ever home/ Big city, bright lights, it feels right, never wrong/ Set in stone/ So, I made a move I had to see the world/ But I'm always coming back, just like a rental/ And I'm sure, that I'll miss you in the meantime/ Just keep my family safe/ Make sure I'm checkin’ in between time/ Watch my hustle streamline/ And from these rhymes, I'll make a way/ Every day I pray/ Stray, bullets will not spray/ And leave a mother on her knees cryin'/ But I was born here/ And when I'm gone, boy I feel like I belong here/ Hear it in my songs, yeah/ Somethin’ like a poet, so you see it in my poems, yeah/ Know my day is comin’, I can feel it in my palms, yeah/ She blow a nigga, so I keep her 'round/ And even though she my main lady, I sleep around/ I cause her pain, cause her harm/ But like a chain, I hold a charm/ So, she always recognize me and greet me wit' open arms/ Welcome home. (Chorus) And even though it's been a long time/ On my grind but you're still on my mind, I must go/ But I'll be coming back your way/ What goes around comes around some day, and trust though/ And even if you're down on your luck/ And you're feeling like nobody gives a fuck, just know/ You'll find your way home/ You'll find your way home. (Verse 2) Back at your bedside, Frank/ I missed you, boy/ I’m fillin’ up just like a dead dry tank/ I witness joy from moments that we shared together/ I never/ Pictured the moments that we shared would sever/ When you think about it, life is kind of like the weather/ Some days are full of rain, but then again some days are better/ Whatever/ Right now I'm thinking back to '08/ A boy was just in his room/ When Mama walked in slow and gave the news just like the Tribune/ But, this here's a celebration/ About the life and the times, call this a dedication/ You used to dress your ass off, guess that's my inspiration/ Had plenty patience/ Damn, God why'd you have to take him/ Guess He needed a angel to make the stars jealous/ It's hard, fellas/ To let go what your heart treasures/ You always told me go for what your heart tell ya/ And heart failure won't keep you from livin’ on/ Welcome home. (Chorus) x2 (Verse 3) Back at the table, pen in hand again/ Damn, I hate the situation that my mans is in/ I'm, writin’ but shit ain't rhymin’/ This ain't no freestyle/ Just correspondin’ 'til he gets out/ Randy, what up with ya/ I know it's been a minute/ It's crazy that it's almost been three years ain’t it/ When I heard about you leaving for a real sentence/ I grabbed my pillow and I put three tears in it/ But on another note/ I'm doing well, I can't complain/ Remember when I used to act like Hov and you was Wayne?/ It's just a shame/ 'Cause the world don't wanna let us eat, it's just like starvation/ I'm tryna make my ends meet so they could start datin'/ And I’m achin’ when I put my hands together at night/ But struggle’s only gonna better us, right?/ We stand together for life/ Soon as the stretch is through/ Let's pop a bottle, got a lot of catchin’ up to do/ Welcome home. (Chorus)
8.
In the midst of all the madness, tell me where can I find solace (SO1ACE)/ Surrounded by the ignorance, so where can I find knowledge/ When all I see is poverty, yo where can I find dollars/ Man, I’m nothin’ like these niggas and that’s just me bein' modest/ A dyin’ breed, it ain’t too many livin’ like me/ And I’m a chubby nigga who’s not to be taken lightly/ Waitin’ on my blessings, practice patience, I’ma wait/ But my destiny’s infinity, that horizontal eight. This is a result, of when I sip and grab the pen then let the music and my journal blend/ The life I want and the life I have, look nothing alike, I call ‘em fraternal twins/ Soon they’ll be identical/ Because I got that purpose, certain shit I’m meant to do/ 3 AM, I introduced you to crack, well this is heroin/ And I’m serving forty two hundred, The Carter Barron/ I flow the people cheer on/ My message is infectious, y’all/ No stress unless it’s sex involved/ The lessons that will test us all. Hardest regardless, I’m a artist like Van Gogh/ So I’m about to paint a picture, watch that nigga Van go/ One thing for certain and another thing for damned sure/ You fall for anything when you have nothin’ to stand fo’/ Just saw my city for the first time in a minute/ They chasin’ gold and snitches (Golden Snitches), you would think they playin’ Quidditch/ Therefore I pray for change because my city is rough/ Dirty money (Dirty Money)/ That shit is bad, boy (Bad Boy)/ Biggie and Puff/ Take that. I’ve done a lot of shit I wish that I could take back/ No, matter of fact, erase that/ I learn from my mistakes/ I hope women takin’ notice don’t lead to a shaken focus/ ‘Cause that hard work pays off/ Takin’ no days off/ I ain’t a dentist but a nigga gon’ floss/ Watch just how I kick it off, like I lost the coin toss/ Born boss/ Fuck the drama that trying to bring/ Hatin’ ‘cause the rhyme scheme leave the booth lookin’ like a crime scene. You should have warned ‘em not to go and get your son involved/ And it’s a dark world, I’m tryna get the sun involved/ Niggas don’t fight no more, they’d rather get the gun involved/ Killed her only child and now she’s flippin’ like somersaults/ Givin’ you real, I’m providin’ these facts/ My train of thought won’t get derailed because it’s ridin’ these tracks/ Fuck wit’ me/ I’m lettin’ y’all aboard/ You listen, I’ll record/ At your temple wit’ the pencil ain’t no way you can ignore it. So, pay attention ‘cause my shit is top-shelf/ These other niggas hungry and I’m full of myself/ And if I drop, I’d sell a lot/ If you drop, you’d sell a bit/ These weak niggas ain’t fuckin’ wit’ me, I think they celibate.
9.
Thank You 04:13
10.
(Verse 1) I say fuck them niggas that hate it/ I made it/ Despite the obstacles/ Watch a nigga blow, like a prostitute/ 'Bout to spit the Gospel like apostles do/ Fuck what you talkin', I turn impossible possible/ And got a lot to prove/ Flow sick as a hospital/ Probable cause for killin' y'all/ And when it comes to this rap shit, I ain't feelin' y'all/ You dudes is spittin' that whack shit, I won't get involved/ This ain't no Mortal Kombat shit, but I finish y'all/ So I'm looking up to God, swear I'm praying that He love me/ 'Cause I'm tired of seein’ Po (poor) and I talkin' Teletubbies/ Y'all remember that?/ I used to dream of writin' plenty raps/ Now, I'm finna change the game/ And you niggas won't get a penny back. (Chorus) I'm from the city where the wind blow/ Know I gotta make it/ I'm puttin' on for my kinfolk/ 'Cause Family Matters but I ain't talkin' Winslows/ And I know there's more to life than what's outside my window/ My nigga/ Aim for the finish line, you’re still strong/ The scrimmage line is not the end zone/ And then they be like "what you doin’?"/ Boy, I'm tryna bring a mil' home/ That got a ring to it, nigga/ Like a cell phone. (Verse 2) I’m heatin’ up, you can go and check the temperature/ Ask ‘em who the hottest and I bet they never mention ya/ Damn/ Lame niggas shouldn’t even pick the pencil up/ Gotta be big (B.I.G.) ‘fore I die, word to Christopher/ So, this somethin’ like the essence of the greatness/ The lessons of the basics/ A legend in the makin’/ So yeah/ You should consider this as sort of my prime/ If you doubt it, that’s nonsense (nine cents)/ Penny short of a dime/ Yeah, a nigga tryna ball/ Yeah, I'm tryna get my hoop on/ Tryna get my coupe on/ Two tone, wit’ the roof gone/ Come up on a deal but nigga I ain't talkin’ Groupon/ I put my whole group on/ We laid out like a futon. (Chorus) (Bridge) Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’ ‘til we make it to the top/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’ ‘til we make it to the top/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’, we ain’t never gon stop/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’/ Keep on runnin’ ‘til we make it to the top. (Chorus)

about

"Well-Founded Fear" is a project that has been in the works for some time now, and I am beyond excited to finally share it with the world. I got the idea to put this mixtape together in the spring of 2011. Since then, I have been working nonstop to make it everything that it turned out to be.

All of the songs on this mixtape are based on and inspired by written journal entries of mine. Furthermore, "Well-Founded Fear" symbolizes the closing of a certain chapter in my life. A chapter that consisted of doubt and fear. But I am now a believer. And I am afraid no longer.

credits

released March 19, 2013

All tracks written by Gynarva "Van 'Go" Monroe
All tracks recorded and mixed by Clinton "HeadAche" Walker III
All tracks mastered by Chris "Classick" Inumerable
All tracks recorded, mixed, and mastered at Classick Studios in Chicago, IL
Artwork by Tekikki Walker
Photography by Maya Jackson

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Van 'Go Chicago, Illinois

Born Gynarva Van Monroe, Van 'Go is an independent MC/Hip-Hop artist from the Southside of Chicago, Illinois. Van considers himself a storyteller. And he puts his heart, soul, and mind into his music. In hopes that it will reach yours as a result. Play the game. Change the game. Don't forget. ... more

contact / help

Contact Van 'Go

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

Van 'Go recommends:

If you like Van 'Go, you may also like: